Starbucks Star-Schmucks

I was visiting NYC this weekend, and maybe this is old news to all of my sophisticated readers, but being a poor country boy not very familiar with the ways of the city, I was surprised to discover that Starbucks has run an impressively successful brain washing campaign: if you order a "tall" cup of coffee they give you their smallest size for the price of a kidney; if you order a "grande" drink you will receive a medium sized cup that will cost you a spleen; and if you order some unpronounceable name you get the biggest cup for the price of your pancreas.

Luckily, Ill Will shares some of my thoughts, with his awesome squirrelly voice:

And as if this weren't grounds enough to reach over the counter and choke the "barista" and shove coffee beans down this throat, they also have a prominently displayed jar for "tips," as if after getting bent over for a urine-sized cup of dehydration, I'm feeling generous enough to donate money to these pretentious douchebags who think they are better than you because they've been programmed to regurgitate these idiotic size names.

Someone is very lucky he did not get killed this weekend... Next time it's on!
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